New Article

Here is the new Article I wrote for Cracked.com about the show "Glee" http://www.cracked.com/funny-555-glee21/

Article I wrote for Cracked.com

Read it and spread it around so I make money.

http://bit.ly/4a9Ml

You dont believe in luck because youre an ass.

I hate it when people say "I don't believe in luck" because its always condescending and they cant back it up. Its always something to do with God and how everything happens for a reason. Saying "I don't believe in luck" is saying "I don't believe in random coincidences that benefit me." No, they happen, just like ones that do not benefit you. We aren't saying it's magic, or the laws of attraction (different group of jack-offs completely). If everything happens for a reason you were supposed to read this and question if everything happens for a reason. Got yourself into a bit of a paradox now don't you? Other things I hate when I hear them "I'm not book smart but I'm street smart" to me that's saying "I'm dumb and I'm OK with it, and you should be too. Now lets have a conversation where I have absolutely nothing of substance to add." And the best one is, "I'm a really sexual person." If a girl has ever said that to you here is what it really meant, "I have burned through a ton of dick...and some vagina."

Younger Girls

I want to date an eighteen year old. Not in a pervert way but someone who isnt a slut trying to sit on every dick like its a park bench after a marathon. Eighteen year olds havent run as many marathons is all Im saying...

Movie Reviews Based On The Trailer

The Stepfather: Oh shit he shaved and now the cops dont know who he is...saw it in the fugitive bitches!

Toy Story 3: Prolly gonna be awesome, is this a christmas day release? Lemme know my jew friends.

Law Abiding Citizen: A merging of "Taken" and "Ray" Gonna be awesome!

Saw VI: We get it! You kill people in intricate ways. Who knew the game "Mousetrap" would have six movies.

Astroboy: Whatever...

Where The Wild Things Are: A young boy starts to have sexual relations with some sort of monster...so played out...

Paranormal Activity: A movie about audience reactions to scary movies.

How To Seduce Difficult Women: Didnt bother watching the trailer...assuming this can be renamed "Rape"

Michael Jackson: This is it: See review of "Where The Wild Things Are".